“There are moments in your life that make you… that set the course of who you’re gonna be. Sometimes they’re little, subtle moments. Sometimes… they’re not.”
I first discovered this quote when I was 13 years old. It always feels so trivial to write about a quote from Buffy, but that is where I found these profound words. They were spoken by someone sent from “The Powers That Be” and not by one of the regular characters. This quote opened the season 2 finale as a voiceover. The audience was taken through a plethora of “moments” that altered the courses of the characters’ lives. As Whistler told us, some of these moments were little, subtle moments. Others were not.
This quote extends well beyond the realm of a television show or television in general. Our lives are made up of moments. Some of these moments pass by with little thought or reflection: the test you took one day in middle school, the afternoon walk home from the bus stop, the fourth lecture presented by your professor about arthropods, and all of the spaces that fill the parts of the day that you don’t tell your roommates or families about at the end of the day. We ignore and overlook many of these little moments because they pale in comparison to the big moments. The paycheck is a huge moment on pay day. The first kiss remains forever ingrained. Your best friend told you she got engaged. A girl in your class died. She was someone’s friend, daughter, and student. Now, your world is changed.
“There are moments in your life that make you… that set the course of who you’re gonna be. Sometimes they’re little, subtle moments. Sometimes… they’re not.”
I can think of many moments in my life that I could use to make an example of these words. My roommate and I were driving home from The Field after celebrating our friend and neighbor’s 21st birthday after an amazing weekend on retreat. I was in great spirits and was basking in the post-retreat high of love. Then, my phone rang with my sister’s ringtone. It was a text message. Three words changed my night, my life, my world. It was such a small moment in time, but a profound moment in my life. It took only three words and those words said, “Courtney Davis died.” Courtney was a friend from high school. She was a beautiful soul and one of the sweetest girls that I have ever met. She was an example of how to live. My sophomore year of high school, her freshman year, she was diagnosed with leukemia. By the end of the year, there was no evidence of disease. After a couple years of maintenance chemo, she was declared cancer free. At five years, the doctors declare you in remission. Cured… essentially. Courtney reached the five year mark and she was not declared in remission. For the first time in five years, she showed evidence of disease. The cancer was back.
I didn’t know that Courtney was sick again. We’d lost touch after I went away to college and only saw each other a couple of times after she graduated from high school. When I received that text message, my world came crashing down around me. Courtney was my hope. She was the one that survived. She was so young and her birthday was only a week away. She would have been 20. Courtney asked that we Pray It Forward and I am doing my best to do so. I’m more intentional in my work and in my life. I don’t want to lose touch with people anymore because we never know how much time any of us has left.
Society can benefit from hearing and instilling these words. Every person is changed; every life is altered, by the moments that make up the days. We can all relate to these words and understand their value and their truth. I spent most of the day trying to choose the perfect quote for today’s quotation reflection. I couldn’t decide on a subject for a quote. I mean, how do you narrow it down? And then, my sister called. Once more, hearing from her altered my world. Only this time it didn’t crash my world; it gave me direction for this reflection. It changed my perspective and led me to these words. You see, she called with a prayer request. A young woman, a teenager, died in a car accident earlier this evening. Her name was Dani and she danced at Ventura College. My sister didn’t know her, but she saw her dancers and friends crumble with grief. She watched as Becky spoke with Dani’s mother. She called because Dani was late for rehearsal and the show opens in two weeks. She never imagined that Dani had died an hour beforehand.
Dani is only one girl that died today. Unfortunately, I know that many more died today… in accidents, from disease, from poverty, by malice, and through personal intention (to name a few possibilities). Everywhere, there are families and friends mourning the loss of those individuals. Each person had a big moment open their eyes today in a new way. Each person’s world shook. Some will carry these moments with them. Some people will be more cautious while driving and realize the dangers in driving because of Dani’s accident (regardless of the causes). Some will be more intentional in their friendships and will regularly tell their friends and family that they are loved. Perhaps in time this moment won’t seem as big, but their lives will never be the same. Each person carries their big moments with them and many carry their subtle moments as well, even without realizing it. Carry those moments. Recognize those moments. Live to the full and embrace it all.
“There are moments in your life that make you… that set the course of who you’re gonna be. Sometimes they’re little, subtle moments… sometimes, they’re not.”
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